heavy methane review on Netflix

heavy methane review on Netflix

Heavy school musical

A lamp amp spits out a riff syncopated by its speakers, a rack of effects pedals with too many pedals for a single foot throne on the ground, posters of Holy Diver of God, of Vulgar Display of Power de Pantera, de Blessed are the sick of Morbid Angel adorn the walls. Hunter Sylvester’s lair (Adrian Greensmith) looks like the fanciful landmark of a pre-adult metalhead. Long hair, rangers, ripped jeans and a patch jacket, at first glance one suspects that this teen is not listening to Aya Nakamura (except in hiding).

Its landmark is the perfect place fora duo of high school students badly in their skin creates a band heading straight for the pantheon of music. No pop, no hip-hop: heavy metal flows in their veins (or at least in Hunter’s veins). Hunter, on guitar and vocals, seconded by Kevin Schlieb (Jaeden Martell), his buddy, pair and best friend on drums, form the SkullFuckers, a group in search of identity, glory and recognition.

Land future Darkthrone (not)

The opportunity to shine is coming soon: the “battle of the bands” of the high school, where they will face a group of Ed Sheeran covers, so to speak the absolute nemesis of the one who lives only for the Metaaaaaal. But there are several issues on their way to hell: the quest for a bass player, and a bunch of teenage crap, from family relationships to school harassment to the first sexual emotions.

Sexual excitement and the bassist’s quest will be resolved thanks to Emily (Isis Hainsworth), a young woman gnawed by anger issues. For the rest, Metal Lords uses the tropes of teen musical movie, with a predictable step-by-step progression, without any inventiveness. Because despite the posters, t-shirts, and references to metal culture, Peter Sollett’s film (Free Love) is not what he would want the public to believe.

Of course, Metal Lords strikes a metal soundtrack where possible, swinging Black Sabbath, Judas Priest or Metallica. Heavy metal seems to be everywhere … but in reality it’s all a huge illusion. A vast mirage designed to deceive metalheads on the quality of the merchandise, or to put in the pocket of teens in need of rebellion with shameless cynicism.

Metal Lords: Photo by Isis HainsworthOIt wouldn’t look like that, but she’s the real metalhead

Use Your Illusions

All this packaging is only there to give a different color to the ever-present same consumer comedies. Make no mistake about it Metal Lords no sincerity. The movie is really justa generic teen comedy devoid of personality, on which the producers applied a “Metal” plaster. Metal is used here as a layer of makeup to make this so-called “unique” teen movie. The plaster could have been an overlay of hip-hop or that of yet another song contest warmed up a hundred times, nothing would have changed.

While metal should have been the heartbeat of the film, it’s just a pretext and has the same uncomfortable effect as seeing Kendall Jenner and Kylie Kardashian wear T-shirts with the image of Slayer. Replacing the OST with WuTang, Dre and Tupac classics, correcting the posters with 90’s rap icons, calling it “Hip Hop Lords” and the sauce would have been the same. Metal Lords is light-years away from the almost juvenile inventiveness of a Ferris Bueller’s crazy day or even the uncomplicated greenery of Pitch Perfect.

Metal Lords: Photo by Adrian GreensmithThe art of making a movie

Once the first “metal” skin of this movie-like onion is removed, all that remains is the ever-present same issues reviewed thousands of times in the mass of generic American teen movies produced to land on mainstream channels one afternoon. school holidays. The parent-child relationship is only mentioned, the issues of sexual questioning and the management of the endemic caste system in high schools … A smattering of déjà vu floats around this overcalibrated product.

All of these themes stink of clumsy recycling and suffer from treatment syndrome by adults who have forgotten their adolescence. Suffering is identified as minimal, the director’s view of the transition from childhood to adulthood isa shameless condescensionand even worse, the characters’ malaise is only considered temporary, as is their metal hobby.

And that’s where the film hits the bottom of the abyss: it lowers the love of music and the passion for metal to a transitional phase, a symptom of adolescent malaise and a thirst for rebellion due to emotional immaturity. Metal Lords shells metal cultureand appropriates its codes only to deliver a brainwashed commercial product that mocks the audience it claims to target.

Metal Lords: Photo by Adrian Greensmith“Mais if it’s metal, it has a patch jacket “- the producers

Metal joke

The film betrays itself when Hunter explains that he is setting up a band in order to be successful, because “heavy music is gonna rise up” in VO. That is the raison d’être of the hypocrite Metal Lords : place yourself in a niche that is not yet saturated with productions cloned on top of each other, hoping to touch the heart, or rather the portfolio of an audience lacking metal productions. No matter the passion, as long as it can pay off big.

The film royally mocks the viewer, and captures all forms of intelligence in the audience, even more so in the metal audience. Here it’s all disdain for heavy metal, and nothing resists the examination of the passionate eye, which will feel insulted from end to end. The Hunter / Kevin duo that claims to be “post-death-doom metal”, while Skullfucker is a thrash metal band. Suffice it to say that Vianney is an indus. To finish the picture of the walking shot, Hunter plays a character from Dungeons and Dragons called “Malmsteen of Gorgoroth” … Thanks for the joke Peter Sollett, it wasn’t necessary.

Metal Lords: Photo Jaeden MartellWhiplash version Leader Price

Entangled in its own disgusting clichés, the film disgusts with intellectual dishonesty, twists and tries to wrestle with a poorly conducted phone script that holds up only slightly thanks to the trio of young central actors. A trio that owes its credibility and alchemy only to the brilliant Isis Hainsworth, whose character Emily, with her mutation as a wise girl into a metal fan of Apocalyptica, could or should have kept a film on her own. which would have been a thousand times more interesting.

In 1:38 of film, Metal Lords produces only one truly “Metal” moment: in the final battle band, Hunter, carried away by the adrenaline and energy released by the audience’s mosh pit, rises above the stage, transcended by the music. Too bad that was the only success shamefully pumped on the staging of Rocketman. And no, the cameos of Rob Halford, Tom Morello, Ian Scott, and Kirk Hammett save absolutely nothing.

Metal Lords: Photo Jaeden MartellLThe only good time in the movie

Lacking the almost thoughtless energy of Tenacious D in “The Pick of Destinyfar from the sincerity of Lords of Chaos or the burning passion of Sound of Metal, Metal Lords it’s just an intellectual scam. Hunter’s character claims that “Metal is commitment and sacrifice” is the opposite: it’s just a disdainful parody and infamous commercial content.

Metal Lords has been available on Netflix since April 8, 2022

Metal Lords Posters (2)


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